Prayer

A good friend and fellow missionary in France lost her mother in a tragic accident yesterday. Her mother was killed in a car wreck caused by ice in Illinois. Joy Davison has left France with her husband and should reach Illinois by tonight for the funeral arrangements. She has always been very close to her family, so please remember Joy, her father Ernie, and her younger sister in your prayers.

This is a missionary's greatest fear: to get a phone call telling us news like this.

Sectional Council Season

Yesterday, I spent my day at Trinity AG in Lanham, MD with the start of our sectional council season. As you may know, the Assemblies of God churches are divided into districts (regional) and then further into sections (also geographic). The Potomac District is divided into 12 sections, which have their own leadership and organization. Our sections meet usually monthly for fellowship and in the spring, the sections have their business meetings to vote in leadership and cast vision for the future.

As a missionary, I travel to all the sectional councils; I like catching all the pastors at once. Apparently the other missionaries feel the same way, because there were at least 20 of us there yesterday. It was a bit over-crowded, actually. I met some new folks and got my foot in the door of a few churches. I had a few comments about the possibility of future support, which was very encouraging.

In other news . . . I am going to return to France for a few days over Easter weekend to settle the last bit of my affairs there. I need to sell my furniture that I left in storage, close out my bank account, and other business. I'm looking forward to catching up/saying goodbye to my friends there, too.

Thoughts on Galatians, part 5

I figure I've got to get a move on with this Galatians series or we'll still be doing in it in November!

Galatians 4:9 and 10 says, "Formerly, when you did not know God, you were slaves to those who by nature are not gods. But now that you know God--or rather are known by God--how is it that you are turning back to those weak and miserable principles? "

I've mentioned that a major theme of this book is the emphasis on salvation by grace--not by observance of the Old Testament law--even though some religious leaders were teaching these false ideas to the Galatian church. In continuing to defend the true teaching on grace opposed to law, Paul asks another of his razor-sharp questions (another feature of this book: the intensity). He uses the term, "know God" and then corrects himself to, "rather, are known by God" perhaps indicating that no mortal man can claim to KNOW God. We are too limited to make that claim, but we can claim the far more important fact that we are KNOWN by God.

To be known by God means that I'm no longer lost, no longer searching, no longer drifting in a black void of the unknown. I'm known by God, in all the richness that it represents. One of my favorite worship songs says, "He knows my name. He knows my every thought. He sees each tear that falls and hears me when I call." All of the intimacies of a relationship with God Himself combine in that one phrase: known by God.

I've been unknown before. Most of the time I didn't like it. One night in particular, I wanted to be known no matter what the cost. In my sophomore year of college, I was friends with some older students and before they graduated, they wanted to play some pranks that would be remembered long after they were gone. So in the wee hours of the morning, we set out to do mischief to the flagpole and other stuff. We were over on the boys side of the campus, facing their dormitories, about to do out next prank when we were surprised (more like shocked) to find out the boys had been tipped off to our presence and were hiding in the bushes to catch us in the act. In the darkness, hiding in the shadows of the theater building, we thought we were alone in our stealth, until one of the boys called out and scared us. We screamed and jumped, as nearly 30 guys popped out of the bushes surrounding us. We all took off running in different directions. I headed straight back toward the most deserted section of the campus, sure that the guys were in hot pursuit behind me. I ran and ran until finally I came to an abandoned handball court. Brush had grown up all around the large wall, and I was crouched against it, my heart pounding from the adrenaline and the running. I sat there staring out at pitch blackness. I was so far from the inhabited part of the campus that no lights were visible. I could only hear my heartbeat, and my whole being was concentrated on hearing those guys coming through the bushes to catch me. I was so on edge that I was scared of every tiny rustle in the brush, and after a long time of hiding in that scary place, I decided I would rather get caught than stay on that black, creepy court with my every nerve on high alert.

I went trudging back to the streetlights next to the theater, knowing that the guys would laugh at me for getting caught in our pranks. "Being known" was far better to me than being unknown and lost in the fearsome darkness of the back side of campus all night. The funny thing is that I wasn't the only girl who had escaped, only to come back and get teased, because she didn't want to be "forgotten" in some hiding place alone.

Many people exist spiritually in that darkness, in a void that is fearful and vulnerable. They do not know God, nor are they in a relationship with God to be "known by Him." That great treasure comes when our sins are covered by the blood of Christ and we enter into a reconciled relationship with God.

Paul's poignant question is valid: why exchange that great relationship for a weaker, more miserable existence?

Follow up Post

In the comments section of my previous post, Anonymous asked: "Having said all that about it being a gift and not something we can work for, how do you explain to these people why God didn't give it to them? Especially after having said that all the people in Corinth were given the gift, and they were great sinners. Can you see why people who ask for the Holy Spirit feel rejected if they don't receive it? I've never really thought about not being able to receive it, but I know if I hadn't received when I asked, I would have felt unworthy and ashamed, like I had done something to make God reject me."

I wrote a quick answer to Anonymous, but I wasn't satisfied with my response. However, with our internet down for day or so and other problems, I wasn't able to get back to this post.

My longer answer is this: I don't know why God chooses to move in certain ways and not others. God is God and He has His own timing. I can't explain why some people are filled instantly at conversion (like certain Biblical examples and others are filled later in their walk with the Lord. But no one else can explain it either; that is to say, no one has the right to "guilt" another Christian by implying that they would receive the baptism of the Holy Spirit if they were more "spiritual" or sinned less.

Consider Acts 19: 1-7:

1While Apollos was at Corinth, Paul took the road through the interior and arrived at Ephesus. There he found some disciples 2and asked them, "Did you receive the Holy Spirit when^[a] you believed?"
They answered, "No, we have not even heard that there is a Holy Spirit."

3So Paul asked, "Then what baptism did you receive?"
"John's baptism," they replied.

4Paul said, "John's baptism was a baptism of repentance. He told the people to believe in the one coming after him, that is, in Jesus." 5On hearing this, they were baptized into^[b] the name of the Lord Jesus. 6When Paul placed his hands on them, the Holy Spirit came on them, and they spoke in tongues^[c] and prophesied. 7There were about twelve men in all.

I think this model gives us a clear picture of a non-judgmental way to handle the situation. Paul doesn't list all the possible reasons that these Ephesians hadn't so far received the Holy Spirit. He simply accepted the situation and took measures to change it.

My concern is that many churches emphasize our Pentecostal experiences ONLY to two groups of people: teenagers (in camp or retreat situations) and new believers (often in Sunday School or small group situations). If someone doesn't have the experience of speaking in tongues after this, they end up in a nebulous place where they feel foolish to admit they didn't get the gift (perhaps when everyone else did). They grow into more mature faith in other ways, and speaking in tongues isn't emphasized quite as much. They sometimes feel that they lost the opportunity, and it won't come around again, and they're better off just laying low about the whole matter.

I like how Paul handled it, by simply asking if the Ephesians had received the Holy Spirit since they believed. When I was a teenager, I had a "camp experience" with the Holy Spirit that was never repeated. In later years, I came to believe that it was probably more emotionalism and sincere zeal than anything else. By then, of course, I felt guilty that I had told people that I was baptized with the Holy Spirit, and I had been mistaken. How was I supposed to "untell" people? The more I thought about it, the worse I felt.

When I was in my first semester at college, we had assigned seating in the chapel auditorium; my roommate Beth was next to me, and two other friends, Dana and Pam, were seated on my other side. One day, just as chapel was ending, Beth asked me straight out, "Are you filled with Spirit? I've never heard you pray in tongues." I hung my head and explained the whole situation, including how terrible I felt about having been mistaken as a young teenager and how I was sure that I couldn't be filled now that I had even unintentionally lied to everyone about it. Beth's reaction was pretty much, "So what? Let's just pray about it now!" So she, Dana, and Pam all laid hands on me down at the altar area of the chapel and I was filled with the Spirit right there. I guess you could say "it took" because I've been filled with the Spirit ever since.

I'd like to see our fellowship continue it's emphasis on a Pentecostal experience, but without ignoring, excluding, or rejecting those who have not yet received the gift of the Spirit.

In other news . . . . I'm edging closer and closer to my budget goals. I'm at least 72% on paper and over 75% once everything comes in that's been promised to me. Each month I've been a little worried about the progress, but God consistently reminds me that He is my source! It's all in His hands.

Thoughts on Galatians, part 4

Backtracking to Galatians 3:5, "Does God give you His Spirit and work miracles among you because you observe the law or because you believe what you heard?" gives us today's thought.

When I was studying French, I was in a program designed for missionaries, which gave me the opportunity to meet dozens of missionaries going to many different French-speaking countries. Most of them were with various Baptist organizations, and very few of us were Pentecostal. I guess we stood out a bit, although none of us were obnoxious about it.

One day, after a close friendship had developed with another young lady there, she mentioned that for a brief time, when she first got saved, she went to a Pentecostal church. Her family was completely unchurched, so she had no inhibitions about which church she attended. She told me that she really enjoyed the Pentecostal church and loved the people there. Then, she dropped her voice and said that her husband didn't know about it, because she later moved to a different area, went to the Baptist university there and met her husband.. The most intriguing part of her "confession" was that she had prayed to be filled with the Spirit for a long time, without success. She sort of laughed and said, "It's just as well. We would never have been accepted into our missions program, if I spoke in tongues." Then she continued, "I was so new in Christ back then, I was soaking up the Word and really growing spiritually. I always wondered what it was that I was doing wrong, that the Lord wouldn't fill me. Eventually, I just gave it up. " She gave me a wobbly smile.

I was surprised, both by her "secret" and by her feelings of rejection, that somehow she wasn't "good enough" for the baptism of the Holy Spirit. I was glad to have the opportunity to tell her that the baptism of the Holy Spirit isn't rewarded to those who deserve it, but it is a gift. As a matter of fact, the whole book of I Corinthians is a rebuke to a church operating in ALL the gifts, but was so unholy that Paul was pretty harsh at times; they certainly didn't merit the gifts of the Spirit with all their carnal ways. Plus, the Bible gives us examples of people who were filled with Spirit from the moment they came to Christ. What had they done in those few seconds to "deserve" the baptism of the Spirit? Nothing, it is just a gift that God gives us, freely of His choosing.

The trouble is that even in our Pentecostal churches, we often mistakenly give the impression that you can work your way into the baptism of the Holy Spirit. I've talked to friends that grew up feeling rejected because they weren't filled (particularly at camp, where it is so heavily emphasized). They become convinced that they weren't good enough to merit that ultimate sign of God's approval.

The good news is that we don't buy our Pentecostal experience with all of our righteousness; you can follow every letter of the law, but "God's blessing does not depend on our performance." (Jerry Bridges, The Discipline of Grace) The fact is, it's not about you, it's about HIM.

By the Numbers

Today, as I prepared to make my usual round of phone calls to pastors, I was struck by the amount of churches with which I've had no contact. Out of curiosity I took my pencil and started counting.

Here is my final tally. Of my total support, I am partnered with the following:

1 church in Florida
2 churches in New Jersey
1 couple in Georgia
1 couple in Washington
1 couple in California

42 churches (out of 101) in Maryland (42%) + 5 couples
23 churches (out of 146) in Virginia (16%) + 2 couples
7 churches (out of 61) in West Virginia (12%) + 1 couple

If you're not aware, I am mainly focused on my local region (MD, VA, WV). I can get support from other areas, but they are more difficult, due to distance and the fact that I'm unknown there.

I got my monthly paycheck yesterday, along with a current statement of support, and I'm excited to say that I'm over 72% on paper. I've got another couple of hundred dollars that's promised to me, and I hope that it's on the way. Every new pledge that comes in makes me feel that I'm seeing the light at the end of the tunnel.

Its been a while since I've posted a photo!

This weekend I was in a church with a wonderfully attractive building. Their lobby was graced with this handpainted design about six feet tall. I was impressed with it, and commented on how professional it looked. As it turns out, the children's pastor is from Washington State and her mother painted it while making a visit east to visit her daughter. It's certainly a striking way to keep the Great Commission the primary focus of the church!

Vote!

Today is election day here in Maryland, and I encourage all of you to vote. Help influence our country for a better future!

Thoughts on Galatians, part 3

Galatians 3: 15 "We who are Jews by birth and not 'Gentile sinners' know that a man is not justified by observing the law, but by faith in Jesus Christ. So we, too, have put our faith in Christ Jesus that we may be justified by faith in Christ and not by observing the law, because by observing the law no one will be justified."

The spiritual crisis that faces every man is his separation from God. Because of his sin, he is separated from a holy God, who cannot tolerate sin and won't allow sin in His presence. When we die, we would be eternally separated from God because of our sin. Jesus Christ came to reconcile man to God, by taking our sin onto himself, so that we could be without sin, or "justified." When I was a kid, we learned a little trick to understand justification -- "just-as-if-I'd never sinned." To be made "just" in the eyes of God means that we are made pure, sinless and we can spend eternity in heaven with the Lord. Simply by accepting the gift that Jesus took my place, I am able to be set free from my sin and be justified in the eyes of God.

I believe as an evangelical Christian that I was created with a nature that was already sinful. No one taught me to sin; it is part of my DNA, passed on to me from my father and his father, all the way back to Adam. Man is naturally sinful. However, Muslims believe that man is born pure, and he is then corrupted by the world around him, which teaches him to sin. While we differ on the origins of our personal sin, the end result is the same: a sinful man, separated from God.

The question that separates most world religions is what we must do to regain a relationship with God. Far too often in history, man has created systems of religion, trying to bridge that gap. Religious law was given first to Moses for the people of Israel, but over centuries, men added laws to the original God-given set. Various world religions attempt to bypass Jesus Christ, the savior we needed to justify us, by propagating their own means to be justified. Islam is a religion that depends on law, similar to ancient Judaism that Paul was speaking of in this passage.

Like Judiasm, Islamic law is based both on the written word (the Koran) and the traditions that become minor laws. The Hadith is a collection of traditions passed down about the life of Mohammed. Over time, righteous Muslims took to following the example of Mohammed in many aspects of their lives, figuring that he must have been pretty holy to be used as a messenger of God. These traditions became part of the law base, as well.

In Islam, one's good and bad deeds are both counted. On the day of judgment, one hopes to be "justified" to God by the weight of one's good deeds. Being law-abiding will make a Muslim just in God's eyes. But Paul makes it clear in this verse (and the rest of the chapter) that law cannot justify anyone. In fact, laws merely prove our guilt, since all of us have broken laws (both God-given and man-made) in our lives. The law is not meant to justify us, but to show us how badly we need the Savior who can!

When I read this verse and the rest of the chapter, I see how simple the gospel is, but it is also very profound. Most people like to have power over their own lives. We want our destiny in our own hands, so having a long list of laws, while they may be difficult to follow, still puts my religious control in my own hands. One can do more good deeds, fast more, work harder and get myself out of the doghouse. It is much harder to give all control to an invisible Savior, accepting by faith that I am now forgiven and cleansed by His blood, rather than by my efforts, which can be measured and seen.

Thoughts on Galatians, part 2

In my recent travels, I passed a car with this license plate: KARPE DM. I mentally translated, carpe diem, Latin for "seize the day."

My brain fired through a string of related thoughts: carpe diem was the theme of the movie Dead Poet's Society, starring Robert Sean Leonard and Robin Williams. The major literary work supporting the theme was Henry David's Thoreau's book Walden, stating, "I went to the woods because I wished to live deliberately . . . and not, when I came to die, discover that I had not lived." The teacher in the movie challenges the young men to live lives that are courageous, beyond the status quo. Thoreau also claimed, "The mass of men lead lives of quiet desperation," which contrasts sharply against the life of one who seizes the day! Who goes beyond the common. Who experiences something more powerful, somehow more worthy.

As all that flitted through my brain in succession, I compared it to Paul in Galatians 2:2, who went to the church leadership in Jerusalem, early in his ministry. "I went in response to a revelation and set before them the gospel that I preach among the Gentiles. But I did this privately to those who seemed to be leaders, for fear that I was running or had run my race in vain."

When I read that verse a week or so ago, I thought it was interesting that even Paul, one of our best examples of Christian leadership in the Bible, had doubts about the effectiveness or perhaps the value of his ministry. Maybe his doubts were only in how others viewed his ministry or what value they placed on it. After all, the book of Galatians is written to correct the idea that Gentile Christians had to practice Judiasm as well as Christianity. Maybe Paul felt that the good he was doing among born-again Gentiles was being undone by those adding Jewish law to the mix, in a sense robbing him of his success or result. That would certainly frustrate a missionary, and I could understand the feeling of "running my race in vain."

"Am I wasting my time? Is this ministry worth it? " Posing questions like these is more common among ministers than we care to admit. Just this morning I read a confession of a minister who said he often looked out a congregation on Sunday morning and wished he could be the one just sitting in a pew. It comforts me to some extent to know that even Paul wondered about the merits of his ministry.

It also comforts me to know that he took steps to combat this feeling of frustration. He went to church leadership and put himself under their counsel. He clearly made his peace with the challenges of ministry according to later books, claiming repeatedly that he was willing to do anything if it would increase his opportunity to preach the gospel, saying that light and momentary troubles achieve an eternal glory that far outweighs them.

He did not live a life of "quiet desperation" but one of outstanding example . He not only "seized the day," but seized every thought to make it captive to Christ. No matter what doubts he faced, his life was worthy.

Wardrobe Malfunction

Its been a while since I've given you one of my embarrassing-moments stories. I know how much you love them! This (mild) one happened to me last weekend in Georgia.

I had packed a gray pantsuit for the weekend, hoping that it would be appropriate in two very different churches: one very laidback and one very traditional. The chief benefit of this pantsuit is not how I look in it, unfortunately, but rather that it is some version of stretch polyester so it is comfortable and resists wrinkles. I have to wear it for hours on end, so I want some measure of comfort and it has to still look fresh in the evening service across town. As long as the suit isn't obviously cheap or shiny, I'm willing to make it my "itinerating missionary" outfit. Added bonus: on sale at Kohls. Enough said!

I wore it all morning while preaching and dining out for lunch with the church in Perry. In the afternoon downtime between the two services, I hung it up and changed into jeans for a few hours. I put it back on and drove to Parkway AG around 6 pm. Shortly after I arrived, I was walking down the hallway and realized that I could feel something in the lining of my sleeve. Usually sleeve lining is so light, you barely register it consciously if it brushes your skin. But I could feel a lump inside the sleeve, right against my hand (the very end of the sleeve). Almost as soon I felt it, a woman stuck her hand out to shake mine, so I glanced down and saw a huge lump visible as I shook her hand. My sleeve looked like three eggs were weighing down the end of my arm, against my wrist. I noticed the woman glanced at it in confusion, probably wondering what on earth was hiding in there.

As soon as I spoke to her, I whipped my jacket off and felt around the inside-out sleeve. There was definitely something large and stretchy in there. But I couldn't find a place where the lining was sewn tightly to the main sleeve. How on earth would something get in there? More importantly, how on earth was I supposed to get it out?

I knew that I would be shaking more and more hands if I stayed out the lobby of the church, so I retreated to the one place where no one would ever approach--the front pew of the church. I was safe there to take my jacket off casually, spread it across my lap where no one behind me could see, and feel around every inch of lining seams for holes big enough to allow something to slide in there. (One time my dad taught Sunday School with a pair of panties stuck to the inside of his shirt from the static cling in our family laundry, and with that memory in mind, I was a little worried about what I would find in that darn sleeve.) When I finally found the opening in the lining and worked my hand up through the innards of my jacket, I withdrew a black sock. My somewhat redneck thought-- "Hey, I wondered where that sock was!" I had to stuff it quickly into my purse and whip my jacket back right-side-in just as the pastor joined me to start the service. Disaster was averted, except for the nagging worry that it had been visible all morning at the other church, dangling from my arm as I preached.